Forged Identity

Today Was A ' Rest Day ' . The Fatigue Of The Hockey Tour Was All Blown Away Today . I Slept At 4.30am Last Night , After Watching Titanic And Japan Own Denmark . I Went Into Slumber Feeling Frozen Out , Because I Wasn't Happy , And I Wasn't Sad . I Guess I Was Just Worried + Frustrated + Down .

Woke Up At 1130 This Morning , After A 7 Hour Good Sleep . That Same Feeling Stayed Throughout The Day . This Is My Somewhat First Time Suffering This , Because I've Never Gotten So Emotional . I Don't Know If This Is For Me Or For Him Or For You . I Don't Know If I'm Doing This For The Sake Of Doing . But I'm At Least Happy That You're Willing To Accept This Again . Had Breakfast Before Lunch Came Not Long After . Ayam Penyet Was Good (:

Texted Faiz And Rudi To Check Out On Them . Faiz Was Going Johor , And Rudi Was Having A 42.9°C Fever . Had Actually Planned To Meet Him To Go City Hall And Get A Cushion Grip But Oh Well , He Couldn't Make It . Left For City Hall At 5 , After Stoning For Awhile . A Lot Was Going Through My Mind , And I Don't Know If This Is Boon Kiat , Or Is This A Soul That's Being Controlled By Others . I Felt Burned And Scorned On The Inside , But Life Goes On As Usual .

School Is Starting In 3 Days Time , And I Haven't Done Holiday Homework , And My Hair Is Still Uncut And Red . I Feel Lousy , But I Cant Give In . I've Experienced Suicidal Thoughts Back In Sec 1 , And I Know That These Thoughts Bring Me Nowhere . I Don't Know Where I Am Heading After This , But I Know It Won't Be So Ideal . I Just Hope For A Better Tomorrow , Like Everyone Else Does . Maybe I Should Be More Quiet , And Let Other People Build The Atmosphere That I Can Build . I Really Don't Know /: Training In School At 9 Tomorrow , Really Tired But I've To Make Sacrifices For It , I Guess . Am I Sinking Like The Titanic Or Am I Surviving Like Kate Winslet In The Movie ? Honestly , I Don't Know . The Long Awaited Start Of The U-14 Tournament Had Been Postponed , And Our First Game Will Be Again Teck Whye , 6 July /:

I Laugh , I Love , I Hope , I Try , I Hurt , I Need , I Fear , I Cry . And I Know You Do The Same Things Too , So We're Not Really That Different , Me And You .

- If you think that your losing someone, never be afraid , cause if that person does love you a lot , that person will take the risk just to have you .